Listen to me! Part I
I am OBSESSED with music! I wish I could have it playing constantly in my head. Hmmm... that sounds stupid. I like to jam in my car FULL blast whenever possible.... you know, I had a sub back when that was cool. I have a playlist for every possible activity, yes... even that! So, I thought I would share some track referrals. Have a listen.
MySpacer
If someone writes "thanks for the add" on your wall, de-friend them immediately. They are a loser.
AMERICAN Idol
Victoria Beckham is hott, but what is she doing as a judge!?! It IS called American Idol, right? Then please tell me why HALF of the judges are not even flippin' Americans!?! Doesn't make much sense to me....
Naturally Cold
TRUE LIFE: my boss just told me that if she puts her Pepsi's and waters outside on the front porch, they taste better than if they were cooled in the fridge. "they get naturally cold"
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Lesson Learned
I've been talking about getting a tattoo on the inside of my lip for a LONG time! I am aware that it's a painful location, and that it might not last forever, but that's what's so cool about it! Sure, you think it's retarded, but this is me not giving a shit, and doing whatever I want. So, I finally went to get it done this weekend, and had it set in my mind that I was going to get a tattoo that represented Texas Tech. My initial request was a revolver, but the guy said it was too detailed for such a small spot, so I ended up going with the Double T. It hurt for like a minute, and felt completely normal immediately afterward. Awesome! I was so excited about it the remainder of the weekend! BUT.... I woke up this morning, and it was GONE!!! Holy crap, what a joke! The guy told me that it might not take, and even if it did, it might stay a year.... but 48 hours!?! I'm pissed! Lesson learned, $60 down the drain, relieved parents.... I think someday I'll give it one more shot.... for sure :)
The Pretty Lights
One of the greatest shows EVER!!! We had a great little group of Lubbockites, and we had a great time! Except the tar-covered floors that ruined my sneakers :(
Juicy
I LOVE to karaoke! I used to hate it because; 1. I suck at singing, and 2. my mom is a karaoke fanatic, so I have generally associated karaoke with no fun. But now that I started rapping, as opposed to singing, I can't get enough! I try to do my faves everytime (Shoop, Ice Ice Baby, Shake that Monkey) but my #1 pick is Juicy by Biggie. Not great for children's parties, but most often a crowd pleaser :)
Funny-Kid-Video-Time
My FAVE kid on my FAVE show (he is hillarious!)
Star Wars according to a 3 year old (this one is just because she is SOOO cute!)
Thankyou, thankyou..... You're far too kind!
My road trips almost always involve breaking laws, and a "hurry-up-n-get-there" mentality. Risky. No one really embarks down the highway with any intentions of getting pulled over, but it has been known to happen. Sometimes it's good to have a little help avoiding that drama. Sure, you can follow someone (preferably a red guy), get a radar detector, or follow the speed limit (psschhhh). But the help I love the most, is the friendly "HEY, COP AHEAD" light-flash from a fellow traveler. I try not to confuse that with the people that are telling me to turn my brights off, but it's always safe to slow down either way.
How nice is that? Who started this gesture? Thankyou, kind sir! What is the opposite of road rage? Road love? If so, it's such an awesome thing! Pay it forward people! After all, the Texas motto for driving is, "DRIVE FRIENDLY"!!!
-dedicated to the person who gave me this idea :)
Is she for real?
This video is pretty entertaining... this is an old woman who is GEEKING OUT while her flight is landing. Luckily, someone recorded this. The video is great, but leaves me questioning a few things.
1. Is that a woman?
2. Is she for real?
3. What type of drugs is she on?
4. Why did the guy next to her try to play it so cool?
5. I'm pretty sure she is a Red Raider, because she continues to get her guns up.
Blue Moon
This New Year was AMAZING!!! It was the first good New Year's experience that I've had in quite a few years, and also the first New Year's in quite a while that I haven't had a boyfriend. (Do you see the correlation here? F boyfriends!) That's not the only thing that made this year's celebration a little bit different, it was also a BLUE MOON! Word on the street was that the Blue Moon was gonna make people extra crazy, so I was pretty excited. The party was great, the people were fun, and I didn't really notice anything, or anyone gettin too "crazy" on NYE. Sooooooo, I guess I like Blue Moons, looking forward to the next one. See you in 28 years!
Can't you see I'm busy!?!
Gentlemen,
Please do not tap a lady on the shoulder while she is running on the treadmill.
1. I am clumsy as hell anyways, so being startled isn't gonna help.
2. Can't you see that I am busy!?!
3. I am here to sweat profusely, so hott, right?
4. If you are at the gym trying to pick up chicks, check your priorities.
5. I KNOW my kicks are fly, thankyou.
6. No, I don't want to join you for a protein shake.
7. Go ahead, change the channel, I'm not watching it.
8. Yes, I've been here before, and I know you have too, nice try :)
9. Sorry if I'm subconsciously reciting explicit rap lyrics, my bad.
10. I DEF don't want your advice on my work-out!
Do what you came here to do!
Swan's Urban Dictionary, Part I
Any song that begins with the words, "we gon' go head n' put it down one time fo Texas right here" is gonna be pretty great.
"If I can't have the best, I don't want the rest" Translation: if I cain't drank no classic Docta Peppah, I don't want none that othah sheet.
Modern Family
When a sit-com is SO GOOD that you can watch one episode multiple times, it's the ish! Modern Family is freaking outrageous! Do yourself a favor and go watch it on Hulu! Get ready to giggle your guts out!
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Taco NOTco
On a recent trip to San Antonio, Texas, a friend suggested that we eat at a well-known Taco joint. After hearing the legend of Taco Taco, I was in! We arrived to find a line OUT THE DOOR! I get excited, and even call my Dad, a Food Network fanatic, to let him in on the taco celebration that's about to occur.
We get in, and get a seat.... this place is pretty small, and doesn't really look too awesome on the inside... so I start to get nervous. They bring us our drinks, and one of our cups had FRESH lipstick on it! Nasty, but overlooked in excitement. CRAP! My DP is flat, but I can handle that, lets' get some food! I went with Migas, always a pleaser, and our table ordered a pretty good variety of menu choices. At this point in time I begin to note the poor punctuality of the wait staff, and the excitement is gone. Starting to get cranky, I look around with a much more detailed inspector-eye. Greasy Mexicans, nasty plates, dirty floors, cafeteria cheese, questionable sanitation, it's a Health Code violation NATION!
Finally, Juanita brings us our nationally-recognized, multiply mentioned tacos. Nothing looked too special upon arrival, and I can ASSURE you that mine did not taste special! Kel's queso was ferosh, and the breakfast tacos were not really anything to jump around about. The boys liked theirs, of course, but "the legend" had me expecting to be blown away.... Flabbergasted! Not in the least!
I just don't understand how anyone could think that place was so incredible. There are taco-shacks in Austin that would WORK Taco Taco. Food Network, and whoever else, you are retarded. That place doesn't even deserve ONE Taco. Taco NOTco.
Under-Pacid
There is an under-pass in San Antonio that is unbelievable. This Ghostland-themed passageway just doesn't seem to make sense to me. Isn't this distracting to drivers? It distracted me from 100 yards away, and kept me in a trance as I tried to navigate through it ON FOOT! Is this a joke? Downtown, where all the drunks are???
Wait, maybe it's a trap. These light DO look an awful lot like police lights, and honestly had me thinking I was getting arrested (much later in the night). Maybe the cops have created this psychedelic-trance-trap in order to catch drunk drivers? Red and Blue in the rear view = hurry, turn left, get the hell out of here. The cops must wait near by, and look for suspicious activity. No?
Maybe it's just an artsy expression with lights in an under-pass. Well that's ridiculous! It amazes me that the city would allow something like this, but hey, it is San Antonio.
Team Spirit
Soooo, there has been TONS of drama about Texas Tech firing Mike Leach. Of course, I am upset about it, but I am beginning to think that some fans are taking it a little too far.
Leach is an offensive genius. He led the Red Raiders through TEN CONSECUTIVE winning seasons, FIVE Bowl wins, ended up 53-11 home at the Jones, recruited balls, and coached the biggest comeback in NCAA Division1 bowl game history!!! Many people have gone as far as to say that he is one of the best College football coaches in the nation. Though said to be a quacky drunk, he has proven that his atypical coaching tactics seem to work. His whole pirate/angry thing is different, and fun, but that's all Mike Leach.... NOT Texas Tech.
I don't wanna paint the wrong picture here, I was PISSED at first too. I made death threats on Adam James, left Gerald Myers an ass-roasting voicemail, and I even went as far as to say I was embarrassed of my Alma Mater. I also think I drunkenly yelled that I wasn't going to watch the Alamo Bowl because I was so fired up about it, but I didn't mean it.
I went to San Antonio, I saw the T-shirts, the posters, heard the Leach-chants, and it honestly saddened me a little bit. People began to forget that there are about 150 other people who ALSO bust their asses, dedicate hours of time, and work every day in an attempt to push Texas Tech towards kicking ass. The players, most importantly, need support more than ever. Their worlds are in chaos, and they are well aware that all anyone cares about is Leach leaving, and the future of the program. Everyone made damn sure of that. How about a million posters about leach in the stands, but not one about any sort of TEAM SPIRIT! ESPN stalked Adam James on the sidelines like nobody's business, and it was all you heard about the whole weekend. Bottom line is... fans everywhere supported a man, NOT a football team. Sad.
What our administration did was crappy, but it's done. It is what it is. We are going to have a new coach, but that doesn't change anything else about Texas Tech Football. Sure, depending on the dude, we might lose some recruiting umph, and have a rough time getting started back up..... but that's all the more reason that they need their FANS!!! That's what you are... a F'ing Texas Tech Football Fan! Act like it!
mexican-whore-pigeon
You would believe my jaw-dropping astonishment as I walked outside to find my car COVERED in bird shit. I have touched this hot stove before, and I should have thought before I parked under a ginormous tree. BUT!!! This was not your every day, bread-crumb-eating, here n' there, white-ish, dried and terd-like bird shit. This was oily-tar, drip n' smeared, party butt, greenish-black, mexican-whore-pigeon bird shit. I can't get this taken care of in a drive thru. When I pay someone to clean this, they are not really going to be too giggity about scrubbing it off. WTF!?!
I would have loved to use the term "Shit Storm" in this one, but that was coined by my refreshingly wonderful former roomie :)
Welcome to the Future! Part II
I got the new version of Monopoly for Christmas, and was saddened to see that they changed the game pieces! No more top hat, iron, or thimble.... it's the future now! There's a freakin' handbag with a well dressed shnorki-doodle in it! What is this world coming to!?! Don't get it twisted, I LOVE Segways, spaceships and flat-screens, but it's still weird. Just another one of those things that makes you think, "wow, this is the future!!!"
Finger Nose Eye
Holy Hotdogs!!! I was researching for a piece about doing "the-one-eye", and I found this.... HAD to share it! Sick!
Today in History: January 4
1885: The 1st successful appendectomy was performed.... couldn't find much cool stuff about today, so get out there and make somthing happen people!!!!
Guitar Hero
I think Guitar Hero is cool and all, but shouldn't be taken to the extreme. I went through a GH phase, and it was pretty serious. I played for hours, all day and night, until my brain hurt. (Consequently, I was a freakin' Bad Ass) I tried all of the songs, but had a few choice picks that I rocked on repeat in the quest for perfection. After a couple weeks, Guitar Hero got old, and I honestly don't think I've picked up a guitar since. Bringing me to my point, I was sitting in traffic today, and one of my championship tracks came on! Killer Queen, by Queen. I have always LOVED that song! But nowwwwwww, I can NEVER enjoy it because of Guitar Hero!!! How can I sing the lyrics while my brain is chanting, "GreenGreenBlue RedRed Blue YellowGreen, Blue RedRed"???? SO FRUSTRATING! It's crazy how after probably... 3 years... that I still have that in my head. Especially, because it's like I memorized the way that the colors correlate with the notes of the song, when I have NO musical knowledge. Hmmmmmm, weird.
WHITE CHRISTMAS 2009
Lubbock had an AMAZING snow this Christmas! Aside from the 72-hour snow-in at my parents, It was perfect! I had a great time playing in the snow with my little sissy!
Lookin pretty RIDIC in Mark the Shark (Dad's) Carhart Get-up.
Taylor busting ass and getting covered in snow before we even left the house!
I was the sledding Champion!
Taylor already having to call Dad and tell him we are stuck.
I found a ginormous snow drift!
So Long, 2009!
2009 held so many life-changes for me, & I am kicking off 2010 THE happiest I have EVER been! I couldn't ask for life to be ANY better (unless I could somehow get my hands on a money tree), and I can't wait to see the new and exciting changes that this new year will bring. Everyone please have a safe and Happy New Year!!! Austin kids, 512-RU-DRUNK.... be smart tonight... use this free ride, don't ride with me!!! :P
Today in History: December 30
2006: Sadaam Hussein was executed by hanging.1995: United Kingdom experienced their lowest temperature ever, -27.2 C. 1981: Wayne Gretzky sets a new record with 50 goals in one year. 1977: For the second time, Ted Bundy escaped from his cell in CO. 1953: 1st ever color TV's go on sale. 1940: CA opens it's 1st Freeway. 1924: Hubble announces existence of other galaxies.
Did u know her???
It's driving me absolutely nuts! A celeb dies, an it's on my news feed for 3 days! There is no need for u to repeat what the last 10 people said! We all know she's dead! The worst is those who are "so sad" and upset about Brittany Murphy passing. Did u know her??? Do u know anything about her other than "Rollin with the homies" and a few okay movies??? Had u not realized in the past 5 years that she was a crack head? She was fatter in Clueless than she has ever been = cocaine habit, duh! Do u think that her death will prevent some major blockbusters from coming out??? No! So get over it, geez. Unless u are obsessed with her, have a poster of her in ur room, have read her book, or memorized all of her movies, then YOU R NOT SAD!!! Get a life please :)
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Little asian works the acoustic
This little boy is about 4-5 years old, from what I can guess. He plays THE shit out of a little Ukulele, and has enough stage presence to take on Sanjaya Malakar. You can't understand a WORD he is saying, but it's still really adorable! I saw this video highlighted on Ellen, and I freaked out. This kid, who was also in another popular YouTube video, isn't even old enough to form fully understandable words, yet he has 11 million views on his YouTube video.... Rock on little man!
Jersey Shore Nut Store
Okay, soooo the 2nd week of JS wasn't as thrilling as the 1st, but still oddly entertaining. I think part of the problem is that I was way too excited about seeing Snickers get knocked out, and have been counting the days until episode 3. It's sad that she gets punched, don't get me wrong here, but I just can't wait to see how it actually went down! Anyways, I read somewhere that the ratings for episode 2 DOUBLED that of the 2-hour season premiere. The show has been receiving tons of heat from "true" Italians, who believe that the show is degrading their culture, blah, blah blah. Anyways, not only is this causing more and more people to tune into the show, an alarmingly ginormous fan base has already developed. Kids are gettin' a kick out of these Jersey Shore Nut Stores.
Snookie "Snickers", JWOWW, Sweetheart, Mike "The Situation", these are some of the incredibly comical nick-names that some of the people on the show have given themselves.
Click on this Jersey Shore Nick-Name Factory to see what YOUR JS nick-name would be! There are some pretty good ones in there, I'm not gonna lie! I got "Vibe Time" and "The Opportunity", and when I did it for a friend, I got "Danny Tan-ner" and "Juice Springsteen" Ha-larious!
I am the Mayor of Las Vegas
As I sit here and watch Casino, a top 10 movie, I can't help but obsess over how bad I am ready to go back to Vegas again. My last trip was a success show, and I came back with a lot more than just empty pockets! (wink) This pic exemplifies the feelings of power, invisibility, and kick-assness that overcome you in that town. I am the Mayor of Las Vegas.
HOB LOB
The greatest arts & crafts store is bar-none; Hobby Lobby. The place is freakin legit. It's no secret that arts & crafts is my main game, but my supply-shopping-technique is. Not only do they have anything and everything you could ever need for a craft project or home decor, but they put on the greatest sales known to man. They have a super duper 50% off sale that is CONSTANTLY going on! They rotate the sale by sections in the store, offering weekly mega blowout prices on certain items. It is key to pick up a schedule and knock-out shopping according to the schedule. For some reason stuff just looks so much more enticing when it's 1/2 off!!!
The 50% off sales are not the only trick to shopping at Hobby Lobby. I want to be clear when I state that these next tips are only for the brave-hearted criminals inside of you all. I don't actually utilize these tips myself, I'm just sayin..... Anyways, though Hob Lob is offering turn-of-the-century crafting supplies, they don't really operate on a state-of-the-art system. Homegirl at the register is still manually typin' in the prices based on stickers. Ahhhhh... the sticker swap. Classic move for a true Hob Lob shopper. Terrible. But clever, and useful when Poly-resin is 50% off, but ceramic isn't :)
Lastly, is not a tip, but a confession. I've not admitted this to many, but in honor of my undying affection for Hobby Lobby, I think it's time I come clean. Once long ago, a friend an I discovered a Hobby Lobby theft-tactic on accident. We were having a Hob Lob shopping spree (which for me, is every time I enter the doors) when we found some relaxing water fountains that would be PERFECT for our moms. We picked 2 out, and placed them on the bottom shelf of the shopping cart under my mountains of paper, paints, flowers, fabric, canvases, ornaments, frames, beads, and anything I could find that had anything to do with birds or was 50% off. I quickly scan the check-out counters to locate the checker who looks most unfamiliar to me, and therefore, can't have worked there any more than a week. Check-out immediately becomes a cluster-F as I try to convince the poor girl that every single thing I have is indeed on her 5 page 50% off list, and there is no need at all for her to sit and labor over it. It gets hairy, since I need everything wrapped in paper, please, and I will be paying using 2 gift cards from my mom and the rest in cash. We load the bags into the cart, and leave the store without her ever noticing the water fountains! Holy Crap! Do we go back in? NO! I feel really bad to this day, but I am confident that I have made up for it in hundreds, maybe thousands of dollarific ways.
I LOVE HOBBY LOBBY! But seriously, quit closing on Sundays. Sundays hold great aura for creativity, and you're holding me back!
Can I marry my iPhone? Part III: APP Factory
There's really no need for me to open each of these with a paragraph on how kick ass the iPhone is. Most people already know this. Those who don't either; 1. have never played with an iPhone, have never felt the glory, and are sadly lost in the dark, or 2. have played with an iPhone, can't break their Sprint contract, are super pissed about it, jealous of your iPhone, and secretly wish every single iPhone-hating second of their mac-hating lives that they were cool enough to have one. So, anyways, onto my main topic of the day; Apps.
There are now over 100,000 iPhone apps listed on Apple's iTunes store, up from 10,000 a year ago, that's an annual growth rate of 900%. Get out of here! That's nuts! As a point of comparison, there are on the order of 10,000 Windows PC apps listed on Microsoft's Windows7 compatibility website. Researchers predict at least 300,000 iPhone apps by the end of 2010, many of the new ones coming from well-known business kings, the famous (ie; T-Pain app), kick-ass consumer brands, and the never-ending battle to create the coolest games.
I love apps. I am still technically new to the iPhone, and am constantly in amazement of the cool things you can do with apps. My first week in the app game, I had every FREE app you could ask for, and was already waist-deep in the non-FREE app store. It's fascinating. It took me about a month to get a hold of myself, and stop downloading/purchasing every ruhtard this-and-that app. I have recently cleaned some out, reduced it down to 5 pages of apps, and luckily figured out how to organize them when I synch with my iTunes. Here are my apps, from the basics to the
hottness, and what I think about 'em.
On my first page of apps, I tried to keep it down to the bare necessities;
-Text; of course, (we have discussed before. Uber Important)
-iCalendar, photos/camera (now also video camera with iPhone 3GS), so simple to snap a quick photo, and has great resolution.
-MAPS! LOVE! I use my this in place of my Garmin now. 4 stars!
-Contacts are good to have handy, easy to jump to specifics.
-Clock = my alarm clock. very useful, just not loud enough.
-Notes, I am always thinking of random ideas, thoughts, songs to download, blogs to write, so I jot them in my notes. When I synch it automatically sends them to my e-mail so I won't ever lose them.
-Facebook, duh. Use it on the reg.
-Bank of America. Kicks ass. Know your financial status pronto.
-Shazam = legit, as discussed earlier
-Loopt = a creepy app where you can pinpoint friends' locations.
-Horoscopes, my eerily accurate horoscope app, on the daily.
-Texts From Last Night/ FML is always a pick-me-up.
-Last but not least, Flood-It!, the greatest game ever. I am legendary. 74% winning average. thankyou.
My 2nd page of apps contains my "serious" apps;
-Settings; technically a necessity app, but not needed that often.
-Calculator, p.s. yes, your iPhone calc has the same functioning capabilities of a calculus-level-graphing calculator
-Handy Level, F yes, I'll take that. baller.
-Compass, Katt Williams taught m
e that every pimp needs a compass.
-Voice memo, can't say I've really used that much....
-Weather stations, so easy and user-friendly
-Stocks, not lately
-News, movies, google = endless information
-Days until is a countdown app, good for vacay countdowns :)
-Magic 8-Ball, you know the drill
-Bubble wrap, just like it sounds, yet somehow, still oddly incredibly entertaining.
App Page 3 is apps that are "things to do" or "activity" apps;
-I have my app and iTunes stores, where I can purchase any apps o
r downloads
-Youtube and Pandora, sure u know 'em...
-Bump and Mover - cool apps where you can bump phones with a friend to share pics, contact info, etc. Very cool.
-A handy to-do list that I use for bill and event reminders
-Spin Art = kick ass, so fun and you can create cute backgrounds worth all .99
-Colorsplash is a cool app for photo-editing, seems like you can really do some cool shit with it if you try to learn, but I paid 5.99 for it, and haven't devoted more than a minute.
-Ransom is a fun app, you can take pictures and place text on them. Good for ransom notes and Caller ID.
-T-Pain App = so fun! Here you can record yourself doing T-Pain songs with that freaky voice changer effect. Can plug your phone up to your car speakers and turn your car into a recording studio. Great for road trips!
-IQ Test, did it once or twice, but always a fave of people who want to "look at my apps"
-Big Oven/Urban Spoon = Recipe/Restaurant Locators
-Wallpaper is one of my top rated. On this app, I can create thousands of personalized backgrounds, with freakin cute options. I made dozens and e-mailed to friends to use :)
- aaaaaaaand.... Atomic Fart app, tons of fart simulations, dont use it much, but everyone has it, one day it could be used to make a funny situation, who knows, it was free, whatev.
My 4th and 5th pages of apps are all games that I enjoy;
-This is commonly what I do when I have stayed up so late that I can't see straight, the TV is off, computer put away, and I still need something "to do". Big fan of some Black Jack, and a lifetime Bejeweled fan.
-Tap Tap revolution is pretty fun. It's like Guitar Hero, but requires noise, so not good when trying to be discreet. Labyrinth is a cool one to play, it's really endless, and to each his own.
MTV'S "JERSEY SLORES"
HOE. LEE. COW! I couldn't possibly say enough about my new LOVE for the show, Jersey Shore, on MTV. It is freaking outrageous! Imagine a hair gel and silicon filled Real World House, mixed with a retard farm and a strip club. Trashy Television at its' greatest. I can't get enough. Honestly, I could type about it for hours, when really you should just go and watch the first episode in entirety 2-3 times. 2nd episode drops this Thursday. The preview shows Snickers, a teacup trash-ball, getting KO'd by a dude! Looks pretty dramatastic. It's definitely gonna get filthy, creepy and weird. Grab your man gel, Snickers & slut suits, and get ready to fist pump your creatine across Jersey.
HOW did I not invent this!?! Part II: Silverware Where?
Doing the dishes SUCKS!!! I hate doing them. period. I am kind of a freak about washing my dishes, in the sense that I prefer for my dishes to be ultra super freaky clean before I use them. I am a big fan of the steamy strong pre-scrub, during which I do my best to remove ALL traces of dirtiness. I HATE it when people put dishes in the dishwasher with food still on them. Get out of here, sick-stores.
The DISHWASHER. What a freaking out of control machine. Amazing. I lived a short period of time without one, Cassie I know you feel me right here, it was absolutely AWFUL! I never really felt comfortable with hand-washed, dishrag-touched, rack-dried dishes. Barf. Thankyou for the dishwasher, William Howard Livens!
Now, onto my radical discovery.... About a year ago, I was putting away some freshly clean dishes as a friend looked on in my kitchen. Watching me rummage through the silverware caddy, the friend asked why I didn't place the silverware in sections accordingly...... it hit me like a freight train! You're exactly right! Why don't I do that? More importantly, how have I gone 24 years without knowing that? Why don't my parents do that, teach me that? WTF!?! It seems so obvious, yet never crossed my "intellectual" mind. UGH! Anyways, now I strategically place my silverware in the dishwasher the RIGHT WAY! It's faster, easier, and it's fun.
Facebook is the Devil, but I love it!
Before I state my opinion on Facebook, let me go ahead and confirm that I am an AVID user. Of facebook. I enjoy creeping on people for hours a day just as much as the next guy, but it really is a horrible thing. But I love it. This could become an entire book over facebook; the Creepy McCreepertons stalking, the brain-washing farm games, the unlimited picture viewing of friends, friends of friends, and even strangers, the over-sharing, stupid quizzes, the wave of old 'foags jumpin' on the FB wagon, the repetitively annoying status updates, the perpetual in-and-out-of-relationshipers, under-cover-potential-employer-stalkage, the late-night lash-outs, the unwarranted chat sessions, living in fear of what you drunk-status-updated last night, it could go on for years.
Yet, I STILL LOVE FACEBOOK. If it were gone, I would die. I have pictures tagged of me all the way back to highschool, 6-7 years ago!!! I would like to think that facebook will always be something to look at, and eventually become a virtual timeline of your life. Not that I will still update my status, and post questionably humorous photos, videos and news stories when I am 50, but I still think it would be cool to check it out maybe...? just sayin...
So this brings me to my point, I'm hearing all this drama about facebook supposedly questioning membership fees for the future. Though I will be pissed off, and hate having to pay it, (notice how I said having to pay it), you bet your sweet ass I will be typin' in them CC digits. So will everyone else. Maybe not the old 'foags, soooooo..... awesome! I am tired of having to monitor my "older" friends, and what they can and cannot discover about my lifestyle through my facebook. PROPS to the facebook dude, he is about to BANK!
Welcome to the Future! Part I
It seems as though the West Texas Windmill Farm is soon to be outshined as the latest and greatest in wind-energy. New prototypes are nuts! Check out this article.
Ruining Christmas
I heard a comical story the other day. A friend of mine is working at a mail/shipment store over the busy holidays. Being smart, and pretty tech-friendly, this friend has found himself frequently having to assist other employees. One in particular is an older woman, who is understandably slow on the computer. She often looks back to him for support when stuck in the delivery system. He stands back and watches her attempt to enter customer information, wondering how bad she is botching it. I couldn't help but laugh hysterically as he told this story, rantin' and ravin' about how many Christmas Presents this lady has probably sent to Budapest. She has the potential to crush families in the tap of a 4.... let's just hope none of my 7 readers have shipped anything from this particular business.
Can I marry my iPhone? Part II: Shazam
OB-SESSED! Shazam is an iPhone app with which you can submit a small segment of any song, and then the app will respond with the track information, as well as easy links to sample or purchase the tune. What a great idea!
I find myself wanting to know the name/artist of a song many times a day! I've noticed that my car only displays this information when I am in big cities, so having Shazam has really come in handy for me in the car. It has also come in handy when at a bar, or place where I randomly hear a good one. I rack up a list of songs, purchase the ones I have to have immediately, and save the rest for when I am downloading one night. So convenient!
Shazam is one of the most popular apps, and has recently been spotlighted in global news for its' rapidly increasing popularity. Strongly recommended.
Mullet Schmullet
Mullets rock, but that's not the only sweet name for this iconic hair style. Try some of these out the next time you come across one.
-Ape Drape
-Kentucky Waterfall
-Schlong (Short-Long)
-Mississippi Mud Flap
-Doggy Door
-Missouri Compromise
-10/90
-Neck Blanket
-Achey Breaky Bad Mistakey
True Life; I got 3 of those directly quoted from Billy Ray Cyrus himself. (inspiration)
The best part about my day is....
well, unfortunately the REAL best part of my day is improper for the public eye, soooo... after work when I have the REAL best part of my day, the NEXT best part of my day is watching ELLEN!!! She absolutely rocks my face off. She is the funniest person in the world! I used to tie her right up there with legend, Pimp, and genius, Katt Williams, but with Ellen's new season on the scene, she has most surely surpassed Sir Shorty Giggles. (damn thats kindof a tongue-twister, so I'm gonna leave it :)
Ellen can brighten ANY of my days. I catch myself listening to it from my desk at work (we have it on in the lobby in the mornings). I try not to pay attention so that I can enjoy it in full once I get home. I sit and I laugh hysterically at my television for 45 minutes(DVR)! She is so witty, and has such a positive perspective on everything! LOVE!
Check out some of my favorite Ellen moments!
#4: Ellen's Magic Microphone. Actually, this should be ranked higher.
HOW did I not invent this!?! Part I: Taco
Do you like tacos? Of course you do, but you HATE loading them up, right? It's so ridiculous! You have to hold it with one hand, while filling it with the other. Even if you get the thing loaded up just right, you put in on your plate and it spills out everywhere... UGH!!! Well people, there is now a solution. THE FLAT-BOTTOMED TACO SHELL. How did someone just now think of the flat-bottomed taco shell!?! How did IIIIIIIIIIIII not think of this!?! People have even labored over making taco-holders without that light-bulb going off. BRAVO to the flat-bottomed taco shell pioneer! Go get some people, they're a real blast.
Farmvile Schmarmville
Okay people, this is getting ridiculous. These 3rd grade facebook games have taken hold over thousands, including my mother, and I can't take it anymore!!!
***First off; if you play these games at work, THIS DOES NOT PERTAIN TO YOU! For you gamers, I am jealous that you have a job in which you have enough free time to play on the internet. Mad Props.
For those of you who spend time at home, at night, on the weekends and endless hours playing ruhtard facebook games... GET A LIFE!!! Do you rush home to harvest your squash crop? Did you have a rumble in the alley with your Mafia? Can you sleep better knowing which Sex and the City character you are most like? Do you really think that facebook can accurately calculate when you will get married? Your Happy Aquarium is so full, but I could care less! You are a GEEK FACTORY!
My mom's wall is covered in tons of random things about ducks on her farm and reaching 40 million points in Bejeweled. It's crazy! This also means that everyone who is friends with her gets a daily flood of her game invitations and a Farm Day recap. Nobody wants to see that. Go into your settings and de-activate some stuff, please.
Do not ask people in public if they will join your Mafia, or be your neighboring farmer. The answer is NO. How can it be so important that you are thinking about recruiting and building your little empire even when you're not doing it? Think more about the things you are missing out on, losers. Go outside. Draw a picture. Play with your dog. Read a book. Google something.
***First off; if you play these games at work, THIS DOES NOT PERTAIN TO YOU! For you gamers, I am jealous that you have a job in which you have enough free time to play on the internet. Mad Props.
For those of you who spend time at home, at night, on the weekends and endless hours playing ruhtard facebook games... GET A LIFE!!! Do you rush home to harvest your squash crop? Did you have a rumble in the alley with your Mafia? Can you sleep better knowing which Sex and the City character you are most like? Do you really think that facebook can accurately calculate when you will get married? Your Happy Aquarium is so full, but I could care less! You are a GEEK FACTORY!
My mom's wall is covered in tons of random things about ducks on her farm and reaching 40 million points in Bejeweled. It's crazy! This also means that everyone who is friends with her gets a daily flood of her game invitations and a Farm Day recap. Nobody wants to see that. Go into your settings and de-activate some stuff, please.
Do not ask people in public if they will join your Mafia, or be your neighboring farmer. The answer is NO. How can it be so important that you are thinking about recruiting and building your little empire even when you're not doing it? Think more about the things you are missing out on, losers. Go outside. Draw a picture. Play with your dog. Read a book. Google something.
Drunkest Guy I Have EVER Seen!
Click here to giggle your guts out!
It gets best at around a minute, so be patient.
It gets best at around a minute, so be patient.
Bizzy Body
I was running today, and dragging ass might I add, when the song, "Bizzy Body" came on. I freakin love that song! When it comes on it usually reminds me of my friend KG and how she loves the song as well. She has a little ghetto flava like me, so we have similar music tastes. The next thing that comes to mind is dancing, which is a fave of mine... but I never thought the song would make me want to run. For some reason today, it kicked my tail right into gear. I was bookin it! The beat was going perfectly with my footwork, and that's a big issue I have with my work-out playlist. Once I realized how the jam had boosted me, I was elated! I have a whole new love for Bizzy Body by Paul Wall.
Now, for the second part of this posting, I was planning on adding a link to the song, so that you could go listen to it. But THEN... I found THIS. Hah! I don't understand it, but whatever rides her river floats her boat I guess.
Now, for the second part of this posting, I was planning on adding a link to the song, so that you could go listen to it. But THEN... I found THIS. Hah! I don't understand it, but whatever rides her river floats her boat I guess.
Did you play with Pogs when you were a kid? Elementary age? I know that everyone from MY school would know what I'm talking about, but not all do. These are Pogs; small, circular pieces of cardboard used for a game we called, "Playing Pogs" ha! clever.... Anyways, I don't think it was really all that fun, but it killed the time at recess, and knowing me, I probably wanted to do it because all the boys were doing it.
I remember having a giant green plastic case that held all of my Pogs. Can you imagine all the kids carrying these around school and on the bus? Everyone wanted to have the coolest Pogs. You could buy them at random stores, but there was a particular Pog Spot that I frequented. It was a comic book store by the bowling alley, and I would make my Grandpa, some of you know him as Stan the Man, take me there after school to make sure I got the latest Pogs. He even got me a Pog Factory once. Pogs came in Happy Meals at one point, this is why I know I'm not the only person who remembers playing. Happy Meal Pogs were terrible quality, though... the kind you barter with the next day at school. Being my Artsy-Fartsy self, I became fond of buying packages of plain colored Pogs and creating masterpieces on them. I could put "David" on a Pog, in a super-cool font of course, make it the same colors of whatever football team he liked, and trade it for 5 Pogs that I wanted. Deep into the Pog Game, ya feel me?Pogs were not only collectibles, they were soldiers.... soldiers in a battle between a couple of 3rd graders. The more = The better, and a Big victory could pick you up a whole new set of Pogs like that! Like soldiers need their King, Pogs need a Slammer. Each player had to have a "Slammer". This was a bigger, thicker, plastic Pog that was used to Slam stacks of Pogs.
Click Here to see a demo Pog game.
Pogs Rock, though, honestly. I am totally going to search for mine when I go home for Thanksgiving.
Can I marry my iPhone? Part I: Text it
I have a kick ass phone. The iPhone. It's the greatest companion a person could ever have. Prior to having my beautiful babyjesus of a "phone", I was with Sprint. I was always pretty satisfied, until you babe ;). Sprint was prevalent in Lubbock, had good service out in the the surrounding areas, and everyone had it. (less Mom on your ass about minutes. deal.) Sprint always had pretty sweet phones too, and I always made sure to stay on top of my cell-game. Remember the Nokia with Snake, do you even have to ask how many sweet covers I had?The #1 thing I do on my phone is communicate with others through text. I have always done a lot of texting, but never any more than I have actually talked on the phone. Remember having to hit the "7" three times to get to "r"? That was terrible. I was pretty bad ass at it, but the keyboard brought me to a whole new realm. Once those keyboards came out, it was over! My lightning thumbs crank out approximately 60 WPM. For the past few years I was in a relationship with the Palm Treo. GREAT keyboard. *Side note; If you still have less than 26 buttons on your phone, I hope you are more than 62 years old.
Technological advances in this new form of communication exchange we like to call "texting" or "SMS" (Short Message Service) have come a long way! One of my faves is the "conversation" feature. This is when phones create a sort of "chat" between you and each of the people you are texting. Much cooler than the old-shool form of text logging.
In all my years of super sonic texting, I have never really been too big on the "cliche" texting. This is texting that they make fun of on phone commercials, where the daughter is like, "GFT on the BFF with a TTYN". I don't really do that. My mom tried so hard to "cliche" text when my sister first showed her the "texting ropes", it was awful. I will typically use the letter "u" instead of "you", and a few others but nothing like "G2G2MBFHSYL".**Side note; I have used WAY too many quotation marks today.
Now with my job, I text quite a bit. Both of my bosses stay very busy, and texting is the easiest way to get to them if they are in a meeting, or on a conference call. I am usually sending them quick questions or letting them know about important issues, so I like to try and sound professional. Lately, I have been looking back on "conversations" and noticing that some of the things that I send in texts are absolute jibberish. Ughhhh! What a ruhtard I must sound like! This maddening occurrence is what has boiled my blood enough to blog 1,000 words on this topic today, PREDICTIVE TEXTING.
I like it SOMETIMES, but honestly think I could live without it. The ability to lean on your phone for catching grammatical errors is just another way the human population is growing lazier. Don't get me wrong... I LOVE LAZINESS AND ANY ATTEMPT TO MAKE THINGS EASIER... I'm just saying that by trusting your phone to catch your mistakes, you're paying less attention to what you are sending in your messages. And once it's sent, it's sent. "Heyyy Stranger" has transformed into "Getty Stranger" on me. Charming, right? My "me" turns into "mr" 9 out of 10 times, and it drives me Bat Shit CRAZY!
The whole incident that caused me to write this today was the case of the "Tag-Along" letter "g". On most words that end in "ing" predictive texting will prompt you for the full word before you hit the "n". Geez, again with the quotation marks. Today I was typing something about driving, asking, and jammin. My phone kept attaching the "g" onto jammin, when I clearly didn't want it! Wouldn't it sound super dorky if I said I was jamminG some music rather than jammin'. Ha! Weird thought that crossed my brain, and led me to creating this iPhone blog series. Weird. I Love it.
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