The best part about my day is....
well, unfortunately the REAL best part of my day is improper for the public eye, soooo... after work when I have the REAL best part of my day, the NEXT best part of my day is watching ELLEN!!! She absolutely rocks my face off. She is the funniest person in the world! I used to tie her right up there with legend, Pimp, and genius, Katt Williams, but with Ellen's new season on the scene, she has most surely surpassed Sir Shorty Giggles. (damn thats kindof a tongue-twister, so I'm gonna leave it :)
Ellen can brighten ANY of my days. I catch myself listening to it from my desk at work (we have it on in the lobby in the mornings). I try not to pay attention so that I can enjoy it in full once I get home. I sit and I laugh hysterically at my television for 45 minutes(DVR)! She is so witty, and has such a positive perspective on everything! LOVE!
Check out some of my favorite Ellen moments!
#4: Ellen's Magic Microphone. Actually, this should be ranked higher.
HOW did I not invent this!?! Part I: Taco
Do you like tacos? Of course you do, but you HATE loading them up, right? It's so ridiculous! You have to hold it with one hand, while filling it with the other. Even if you get the thing loaded up just right, you put in on your plate and it spills out everywhere... UGH!!! Well people, there is now a solution. THE FLAT-BOTTOMED TACO SHELL. How did someone just now think of the flat-bottomed taco shell!?! How did IIIIIIIIIIIII not think of this!?! People have even labored over making taco-holders without that light-bulb going off. BRAVO to the flat-bottomed taco shell pioneer! Go get some people, they're a real blast.
Farmvile Schmarmville
Okay people, this is getting ridiculous. These 3rd grade facebook games have taken hold over thousands, including my mother, and I can't take it anymore!!!
***First off; if you play these games at work, THIS DOES NOT PERTAIN TO YOU! For you gamers, I am jealous that you have a job in which you have enough free time to play on the internet. Mad Props.
For those of you who spend time at home, at night, on the weekends and endless hours playing ruhtard facebook games... GET A LIFE!!! Do you rush home to harvest your squash crop? Did you have a rumble in the alley with your Mafia? Can you sleep better knowing which Sex and the City character you are most like? Do you really think that facebook can accurately calculate when you will get married? Your Happy Aquarium is so full, but I could care less! You are a GEEK FACTORY!
My mom's wall is covered in tons of random things about ducks on her farm and reaching 40 million points in Bejeweled. It's crazy! This also means that everyone who is friends with her gets a daily flood of her game invitations and a Farm Day recap. Nobody wants to see that. Go into your settings and de-activate some stuff, please.
Do not ask people in public if they will join your Mafia, or be your neighboring farmer. The answer is NO. How can it be so important that you are thinking about recruiting and building your little empire even when you're not doing it? Think more about the things you are missing out on, losers. Go outside. Draw a picture. Play with your dog. Read a book. Google something.
***First off; if you play these games at work, THIS DOES NOT PERTAIN TO YOU! For you gamers, I am jealous that you have a job in which you have enough free time to play on the internet. Mad Props.
For those of you who spend time at home, at night, on the weekends and endless hours playing ruhtard facebook games... GET A LIFE!!! Do you rush home to harvest your squash crop? Did you have a rumble in the alley with your Mafia? Can you sleep better knowing which Sex and the City character you are most like? Do you really think that facebook can accurately calculate when you will get married? Your Happy Aquarium is so full, but I could care less! You are a GEEK FACTORY!
My mom's wall is covered in tons of random things about ducks on her farm and reaching 40 million points in Bejeweled. It's crazy! This also means that everyone who is friends with her gets a daily flood of her game invitations and a Farm Day recap. Nobody wants to see that. Go into your settings and de-activate some stuff, please.
Do not ask people in public if they will join your Mafia, or be your neighboring farmer. The answer is NO. How can it be so important that you are thinking about recruiting and building your little empire even when you're not doing it? Think more about the things you are missing out on, losers. Go outside. Draw a picture. Play with your dog. Read a book. Google something.
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