Food Baby

So, I've made it very clear in the past that I have no sympathy for homeless beggers. Notice how I said beggers there. If you are homeless, but putting forth some effort to getting a job or being a contributing member of society, then you're okay. BUT! If your idea of getting some income is standing on the corner asking for OTHER people's hard earned money, then get out of my direct line of vision, please. Here in Austin, they are everywhere! Initially, this was a huge culture shock for me, but now it is just a great source for people watching.

Last week I was sitting at a light, on my way to work, when I noticed a begger-chick who was cracked out like Whitney Houston in Africa. She was not your typical crack-head though.... she had some junk in the trunk, AND in the front seat. I feel 98% confident in saying that her junk in the front seat was NOT a baby! Call me a hater, but I could tell right off the bat that this bitch was faking. I can push my belly out like that too, and the over-done curvature of your lower back is a dead give away you eff'ing retard. Obviously, this girl has seen an increase in donations with her pregnancy act, so she is totally gonna work that angle. Sick world.

As she strutted her excess weight up and down the median, doing all the classic preggo-body language, people ate it up! I hate watching people give beggers money, it totally gets my goat. Give this hoe some milk, or some nutrients, not money for her to buy more crack with, please! She exhausted all of the potential suckas at the light, and headed over to the bus stop for a break. TRUE LIFE: the girl goes over to the bench, HIGH FIVES her man, and plops that ass down with pride. Disgusting. How about you high five over an interview at McDonald's, or finding some day work? She sat her poster on the ground, and stretched her feet across the bench, disregarding the 7 people waiting, who are actually going to THEIR JOBS! She is still caressing the food baby in her tummy, and even goes so far as to UNBUTTON her jeans on the bus stop bench. In public, directly in the line of vision of 30 people waiting for green. GET. A. LIFE! and please do it more than 200 yards away from my apartment. Thankyou.